Happy Birthday!

Dear Shruti,

For lack of a more original title, happy birthday! I know you hate attention, especially on your birthday, but I had to (don't kill me). I mainly just want to thank you for making the last year and a half of my life the best ones yet. And remember, always keep smiling.

Love you babe! ;)

PS: I was really close to putting an embarrassing picture of you instead. Thank God I didn't.

A Collection of Random Trivia - Facebook, Homeless People, and Whiskey

My high school advisor said that if he ever opened up a university, he would create a do-it-yourself institution that promotes independent thinking and intellectual curiosity. More specifically, he said it would be the most selective school in the country, and it would only accept 100 students or less. The purpose would be to find students who are naturally curious and have the desire to learn about almost everything in the world in order to have a better understanding of the world. I'm not sure if Mr. New would write me a recommendation letter for his own school once he opens it, but I always loved that concept. Moreover, I think that a liberal arts education is the closest that one can get to having a well-rounded education that focuses on a lot of different areas of study and developing the necessary tools in order to become a successful professional and human being.

Although I have yet to enjoy the fruits of my college labor, I believe that this system helps stimulate intellectual curiosity and a desire to further explore the world, even if it's from a laptop. I can't say that this post has much of a purpose, but I am using it to simply share with you some of the most interesting things I've learned throughout recently by reading and doing some research on random things I'm curious about. Instead of simply pestering my one friend who says I spend my entire time reading random, and possibly useless trivia, I decided to share these with the rest of you. So here is a collection of stuff you may or may not care about:

Dunbar's Number

Some of you may have heard about Dunbar's number, especially is you ever took any psychology or sociology classes, but I first heard about it last summer. Even though I didn't know it by name, I first heard about the ideas behind it after reading an article about Facebook and the plethora of friends we all have on the world's leading social network. The article talked about how we all have an obsession with getting more and more friends even though we have absolutely no desire to ever have a real interaction with most of them. It also touched on the fact that Facebook makes most people unhappy because of the artificial 'everyone's-having-fun-but-me' idea that's perpetuated on a daily basis whenever someone else posts pictures of them having a blast with literally the rest of the world. Steering back from this Facebook-bashing tangent and towards Robin Dunbar again, what I heard last summer was that human beings can only truly have a real relationship with about 150 people at one given moment.

Dunbar's actual studies showed that an average person's limit to the number of people they can actually have a relationship with is between 100 and 230, but 150 is most commonly used figure. I bring this up because it just goes to show how brainwashed we've become by the Facebook system that is constantly suggesting more and more people as "friends" only because we have mutual friends (or acquaintances) with them. I think it would be a cool social experiment if people tried to unfriend people until they got down to Dunbar's number (I should probably listen to my own advice with my 850 friends and all...). It might give people an idea of who really matters to them in the grand scheme of things and who's disposable. And sure, there's the argument that networking as much as possible is the best way to open up more opportunities in your life, but that's why there's LinkedIn.

House Homeless People

Talking about a slightly more depressing subject, do you ever feel bad about walking down a crowded city and seeing a homeless person with a cardboard sign asking for money and/or food but walk past them anyways because of the fear that they might be dangerous or that they'll use the money for drugs? Well, giving them money might not be the solution, but leaving them to fend for themselves without any resources isn't either. Echoing a Cracked article I read a while ago, a study showed that leaving homeless people without a home is actually more expensive than giving them a home.

This is from an article that talked about Poles who lived off of barbecued rats and alcoholic handwash.

There was a five-year study done in Boston that monitored the lives of 119 homeless people. Due to their poor health conditions and lack of available resources, they ended up having a combined 18,834 visits to the emergency room in public hospitals funded by taxes. Spending only $24,000 a year, this country could give shelter, food, and other services to homeless people. If you think that's a lot of your tax money, just think about the fact that it takes about $1 million a year to keep them freezing their asses off in some dumpster.

Whiskey

In order to end this random of assortment of facts, I decided to talk about the first drink I ever had in college--whiskey. Besides promoting a more vibrant social scene and embarrassing dance moves, I never thought that whiskey really had any benefits. According to a study by Scottish scientists, the process used to make whiskey leaves behind barley residues which can be used to purify water. These seemingly futile residues can be used to purify up to 95% of water contaminants in order to clean it in a cheap and chemical-free fashion.

Now that I've given you an excuse to buy whiskey on a regular basis in order to promote water cleanliness, I'll end this post with another whiskey story. Denis Duthie, 65 year-old New Zealander, made the mistake of mixing his diabetes medication with vodka on his 50th wedding anniversary. This combination can cause short-term problems such as temporary blindess, but in very rare cases, it can cause permanent blindness. Duthie had the misfortune of suffering the latter due to methanol poisoning. After making it to the ER, the doctors came to the conclusion that methanol could be counteracted with ethanol in order to suppress the chemical that caused him the blindness. Knowing that whiskey has ethanol, one of the doctors prescribed a large amount of whiskey for Duthie in the off-chance that it might actually give him his eyesight back. Surprisingly enough, it worked--he woke up five days later with the ability to see once again. And just a few days after his 50th wedding anniversary took a sour turn, a nice cocktail of sour mash allowed him to celebrate it in full.

The Waiting Game

The Waiting Game

The on-going, dissatisfying, and apparently never-ending job search continues. I continue to go through the painful process of writing dozens of cover letters a day combined with the most ridiculous and inefficient application forms in the world. I completely understand the need to have resumes--documents that highlight your entire life's work in one page(or at least the important crap--everything else is apparently futile). And I understand cover letters to some extent because they allow you to elaborate a little more on why you would be a good fit for the job(and prove that you actually read a little bit about the company).

But I will never understand the purpose of these long, eleven-page applications that ask you overly redundant questions already answered in your resume and/or cover letter about your past five jobs, three work references, your college education, your high school education, your middle school education, your GPAs, your race and ethnicity, what makes you smart and quirky, why you're a team player, how many games of Scrabble have you played in your life, etc. It's just frustrating to spend hours explaining how going to a liberal arts college and writing poetry under a tree(which is what my brother's high school college advisor said about liberal arts and what many employers might think of  me) puts you ahead of the pack--the least they can do is send you a simple rejection e-mail.

As disappointing as a college grad's job search can be, every now and then, a silver lining does sneak its way into one's inbox every now and then. One of the companies I was very excited about applying to sent me the following email to help me keep my chin up a bit.

Dear Mr. Utermohlen,

Thank you for your interest in _____.

We have carefully reviewed your qualifications. Although we would like to represent you at this time, based on our clients' needs, we are only able to pursue senior talent that can demonstrate several years of professional creative or production expertise.

You are certainly off to a great start in the creative industry. We would like to encourage you to consider _____ again when you have had the opportunity to further develop your work experience. Good luck in your future endeavors and we wish you great success.

Best regards,
_____

As much as it stings to get rejected, kind words do have the power of easing the pain every now and then, and it can give someone the necessary boost to keep from giving up. And who knows, maybe one day you won't get rejected.

The Other Waiting Game

Although waiting usually sucks, it can be exciting. Really exciting. I completely finished applying to eight grad schools with the intent of pursuing an MFA in Creative Writing several times because of application items I kept forgetting. But I didn't mind those applications at all, and I am not nearly as frustrated about this waiting game than the job one. However, I am much more anxious about it. I am terrified to hear whether or not I get into at least one school(which would be pretty good considering that most top schools only accept 1-3% of its applicants--getting into an MFA program is harder than getting into law school). Besides, having the Masters degree would make the job search a lot less frustrating. Seeing as how the MFA is the terminal degree for Creative Writing, I might actually get a job three short years from now.

Just like the e-mail from the "job" section of this post put a smile in my face, so did a Facebook message I got from a friend recently. For my last piece, I talked about a memory I had of my childhood where all I dreamed about was dunking. As a way of both continuing his neverending productivity and inspiring me to continue writing creatively, my friend and brilliant graphic designer Hector Abreu created the following illustration based off of my post:

Needless to say, it's one of the coolest most uplifting things I've seen in a while. And just like I dreamt of dunking as a kid, I continue to dream about joining the professional world of the written word.

Childhood Dreaming

I was recently thinking of the fact that we always look up to the people who climb seemingly unreachable heights. As a kid, I loved the characters of cartoons and TV shows like Dragonball Z and Power Rangers where people actually had superpowers, but I knew that these were not grounded in reality--the people I truly admired were the real people who had achieved the same immortality. Especially athletes.

The first sport I was a big fan of was basketball and the NBA of the nineties. Following my older brother's knowledge of the game, I quickly knew the names of Charles Barkley, Karl Malone, Grant Hill, Hakeem Olajuwon, Alonzo Mourning, and Air Jordan (everyone had these shoes, seriously). I played some ball as a kid in order to learn the sport at a very elementary level. Although I was never any good, my brother and I enjoyed the sport so much that we got a basketball hoop in our backyard one year, and there's one specific moment from second grade that always sticks out to me.

As much as I thought that Scottie Pippen and Shaq were the coolest guys out there, I thought that dunking was the coolest thing that anyone could ever do. I kept seeing the older brothers of my friends and other older boys being able to dunk in hoops that were not nearly as high up as the NBA ones, but it still seemed awesome. I always dreamed of dunking, so one day I decided to make this a reality. My hoop was right outside my parents' parkway, so I decided to see how high up and how far away I would be from the hoop if I stood on top of my mom's car.

I also thought you could only dunk sticking your tongue out.

I climbed the back of her car which was facing the hoop, but there were still a couple of obstacles. First of all, I wasn't sure my tiny self could jump far enough to catch the rim without slipping and falling on my ass. However, I knew that I could jump high enough to reach the rim, but my parents' driveway has a short roof so I was scared that I would hit my head before even reaching the rim. The trick was to somehow jump as far and high as I could while crouching my head and then lifting it back up as I got to the rim while extending my hands and grabbing hold of it.

After a few moments of hesitation, I decided to do it. I leapt from that car determined to be the first seven-year old kid to dunk. I somehow managed to make it out of the parkway without hitting my head on the roof and I managed to extend my arms just far enough to grab the rim with my tiny hands. As I grabbed the rim, I was enthralled by what I was accomplishing so I lifted myself up a little with a huge smile on my face. This ecstasy clouded my senses enough to make my fingers slip and fall down along with the rest of my body. I fell on my ass in an awkward position that made gravity thrust my head down to the concrete along with the rest of my body, causing me to lose consciousness.

This is what I was trying to do.

I woke up what felt like months later with in a complete daze and a terrible headache. I suffered momentary amnesia(not sure if that's a term, but you get my point), and I started asking all sorts of questions out of the confusion. "Where am I? What day is it? How old am I?", but I was eventually fine and resumed to play video games later that night.

Although I didn't suffer any permanent brain damage or break any bones, this is one of the most vivid memories I have of my childhood. It was an attempt to reach some level of common ground with these leaping superheroes. At the time, blasting a basketball through a hoop while holding on to the rim semeed like the most important thing in the world. And although I came crashing down after achieving that, at least I came down in a blaze of glory, and I think that matters.

I think that dreaming and doing something about it in some level--in any level is important. It makes us realize that even though we will never be that big or talented, we can be just like them in some scale, and I find some satisfaction in trying out the things we love and see what happens. As bad as that migraine was, holding on to that rim for two seconds was awesome.

Today's Youth as Described by a 21st-Century Prophet

I've had the fortune of knowing Muahaha for several years now. I've always seen him as one of the deepest and most philosophical people I know. He is a minimalist with a love for the simple pleasures of life. We often have conversations discussing the current state of the world and where young adults are headed. In one of my old posts, I used several people's answers on a series of questions to learn more about youth today. For this particular post though, I wanted to explore the same subject in more depth through someone who's seen a little bit of everything. All build-up and bias aside, here is the voice of our generation's take on youth today:

A true visionary.

How old are you?

21.

How's it going?

No complaints.

How is the 21st century different from the 20th century?

There are more opportunities and easier ways of doing things, yet these are wasted by us..

How would you describe the average young male of 2013?

No idea, but if the internet is any indication...I need to grow up. And these are the words of a 21-year old boy.

How would you describe the average young female of 2013?

They need to get in gear--they have achieved so much on a global level, in some places more than others, but they can't fall asleep on opportunity, they can't let themselves be suffocated by reality shows and Twilight and other intellectual tumors. Stop hating each other and don't be extreme feminists that hate everything about men, and simply live up to the beautiful, maximum potential that you can be... Be independent, but don't fall into overly self-important role that many woman fall into when achieving independence. Not all women fall into that though.

What do you think of pop music today?

Horrible... although 90s music wasn't much better. I don't know dude, it's just that during the last decade, music has just been like "go out to drink fuck I have money woop woop". And it's cool to have the need to go out and have fun, but damn, there's a world beyond that.
1/3 of Ensiferum's songs are about eating and drinking and getting wild too, but the other 2/3 of their songs explore the rest of the spectrum of life.

What about movies today?

Hollywood is really burned out--but there are still some really cool and original stuff coming out. I can't complain too much about that--I think we're doing alright. There will always be garbage, but there's still a lot of good stuff.

Literature?

50 Shades...we're fucked.

Fashion?

I am artistically retarded, but jeans and white/black t-shirts are all I'll ever need in this life.

What do you think will be the most popular pofession in ten years?

Unless there is some revolutionary technological discovery....whatever Snooki's doing.

What profession will die out within the next ten years?

Pendolismo.

Why is to so hard for our generation to get a job?

Mm, well here(in the DR), the education is very deficient because it's focused on creating slaves who can barely function at the base of the pyramid. There's a lot of demand and very little good or decent jobs. I'm sick of seeing overqualified people in mediocre jobs.

What is the best aspect of today's youth?

That we're young! That we have energy and we're idiots and we can dream and do literally anything, but today there isn't anything special about our youth. Easier transportation and communication, but I think that limits the adventure. I sometimes envy the young viking who would sail out on his boat with his friends to God-knows-where to see the world... that took a type of courage that I think doesn't exist anymore.

What is the worst aspect of today's youth?

I think I just answered that question.

How would you describe today's youth?

Lethargic? It's like I said--there are many opportunities and tools that didn't exist before... I think about how limited we were in the 12th century for example. That's sad, but with all the wonderful, even MAGICAL things that we have thanks to science and technology...and we only want cellphones. And then we complain that there's nothing to do.

Last question, what will future generations think of us?

The same thing we think about earlier generations--that we are ancient people with very limited technology... and depending on whether we clean or finish fucking up the planet, that we were (ir)responsible.

Writing Through Wright and Transtromer

It can be frustrating to have nothing to write about at times. In fact, it's really frustrating to be at a loss for words when you have all the time in the world to come up with something interesting--but you can't always be inspirational. Writers are sometimes boring slobs with no idea on how to construct an idea or even a simple sentence. The only logical thing is to look externally in order to get started again.

To this day, my best reading memory was spring break of my Junior year of high school when I read The Outsider by Richard Wright. Even though this novel is highly overshadowed by Native Son, considered by many to be Wright's masterpiece, it is one of the finest books I've ever read. The book has a long existentialist debate between two of the characters which I constantly think about because it reminds me of how frustrating it can be to find self-worth at times. Keeping with the sentiment I felt when starting this blog post, I decided to add an excerpt from it:

"Maybe man is nothing in particular,' Cross said gropingly. 'Maybe that's the terror of it. Man may be just anything at all. And maybe man deep down suspects this, really knows this, kind of dreams that it is true; but at the same time he does not want really to know it? May not human life on this earth be a kind of frozen fear of man at what he could possibly be? And every move he makes might not these moves be just to hide this awful fact? To twist it into something which he feels would make him rest and breathe a little easier? What man is is perhaps too much to be borne by man..."


Just like The Outsider is probably my favorite novel, Swedish maestro Tomas Tranströmer is one of the most satisfying poets out there. Fianlly winning the Nobel Prize in Literature in 2011 after almost two decades in the ballot, the prolific poet deals with the natural world and the people who live in it from a perspective that adds a mystic quality to it. The wonder in his poetry is a constant that make us reconsider our place in this earth. I have included two of my favorite poems of Tranströmer's(translated by Robert Bly):

Under Pressure

The blue sky’s engine-drone is deafening.

We’re living here on a shuddering work-site

where the ocean depths can suddenly open up

shells and telephones hiss.

You can see beauty only from the side, hastily.

The dense grain on the field, many colours in a yellow stream.

The restless shadows in my head are drawn there.

They want to creep into the grain and turn to gold.

Darkness falls. At midnight I go to bed.

The smaller boat puts out from the larger boat.

You are alone on the water.

Society’s dark hull drifts further and further away.

 

 

Outskirts
Men in overalls the same color as earth rise from a ditch.
It's a transitional place, in stalemate, neither country nor city.
Construction cranes on the horizon want to take the big leap,   
but the clocks are against it.
Concrete piping scattered around laps at the light with cold tongues.
Auto-body shops occupy old barns.
Stones throw shadows as sharp as objects on the moon surface.
And these sites keep on getting bigger
like the land bought with Judas' silver: "a potter's field for   
burying strangers."'


I wanted to end this post in a slightly happier mood, so I decided to include one of my favorite songs. Regardless of how I feel, this song(starting at 1:30) always serves as a beacon of sorts--remining me that there is an almost endless supply of new dawns:

Breathe in the night
That crusted tired sunrise
Born again the day
Brings young naivety

A laptop souvenir is worth the weight
In silver a golden son
You'll be home again
And I'll be home again

Mend in my sleep
I'm boxing under water
Waddle on the wake
Waking on the summer day (a summer day)

After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times

And every father's pain
Casts a shadow over a broken son
You'll be whole again
And I'll be whole again

Munificent, artless and ascetic
Playing like a scared
Enthusiastic poodle

After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times ( the troubled times )

All those years
I was hurting to feel
Something more than life

All those years
After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times ( the troubled times )

All those years
I was hurting to feel
Something more than life

My 2012 in pictures

The title explains it all. I can't start 2013 without looking back at what 2012 meant to me in a personal and professional level. If you were asleep for the last year or so, this is a pretty good summary of what 2012 was and what 2013 will be (thanks Shruti). Without further ado, here are some of my favorite memories of the year:

I started the year off back home before beginning my last semester of college, and it took me until the end of the year to go back again.

  

Finally saw a Megadeth show after a seven-year wait. It was great to see the band that made me appreciate music as much as I do now live. More importantly, I got to show off my amazing skills in experimental, avant-garde photography here...

 

Nothing says youth like being a 21 year-old in a creepy bar double-fisting cheap LITs with your buddies.  

 

The International Fashion Show marked my debut as a Mexican model (poncho courtesy of Derik Yager).

 

Double date with best friends at an Irish pub with drinks, burgers, and dessert. Doesn't get much better than this.

 

Ah, the cupola. Finally made my way up there thanks to English 304--possibly my favorite class of my college career. We were reading essays about seeing the world from a different perspective than usual and this field trip helped us breath in campus from a new and exciting view. 

The 2011-12 edition of The Mercury, Gettysburg College's literary magazine, marked the pinnacle of my work as a staff member for it. From nonfiction and fiction reader, to Managing Editor, to Co-Editor in Chief, it was great to see this baby come to life with the help of 40 other individuals dedicated to literary excellence.

 

 The last Phi Psi formal was truly an end of an era of a ride that started in January 2010. I met the greatest group of guys, had fun, and did some good things along the way. I'll miss you all.

  

 Senior skip day is still a thing in college apparently. Had a good time in the sun less than a week before graduation day with some friends. Xavier is analyzing my rock-skipping skills here (we even had a conversation with some strangers about the right rocks, form, and mentality necessary for rock-skipping).

 

There's a better graduation pic of me out there somewhere, but I opted for the one that showed many of my classmates (plus I couldn't find the other one). Sounds like a cliche, but it feels great to see all that money, hard work, and parties recognized by President Riggs and a diploma.

 

By far, the best job experience I've ever had has been with The Gettysburg Review. After a senior year fall internship with them, I had the pleasure of working with the great staff of the Review during the summer once again.

There was an epic weekend in early July where four of my best friends all had birthdays. Seeing MJ finally turning 21 after college was a relief for us all, and the weekend included visits from many recently graduated seniors. A last hurrah indeed.

 

This is literally everywhere. He somehow danced his way to my blog.

 

Alumni weekend felt like another reunion of the recent Gettysburg grads, but it felt more real. I went into it more in depth in a previous post--it was a good way to hear where everyone was headed after college.

Umm...Halloween?

 

 Just before going back home, I got to go to my girlfriend's formal and spend some time with her and friends. Sometimes, there's nothing better than spending time with those you love.

I finished the year by going to the beach for the first time in a while. Although this was the 29th, I this is pretty much how the year ended--beach, sun, friends, and drinks. Cheers 2012!