Writing Through Wright and Transtromer

It can be frustrating to have nothing to write about at times. In fact, it's really frustrating to be at a loss for words when you have all the time in the world to come up with something interesting--but you can't always be inspirational. Writers are sometimes boring slobs with no idea on how to construct an idea or even a simple sentence. The only logical thing is to look externally in order to get started again.

To this day, my best reading memory was spring break of my Junior year of high school when I read The Outsider by Richard Wright. Even though this novel is highly overshadowed by Native Son, considered by many to be Wright's masterpiece, it is one of the finest books I've ever read. The book has a long existentialist debate between two of the characters which I constantly think about because it reminds me of how frustrating it can be to find self-worth at times. Keeping with the sentiment I felt when starting this blog post, I decided to add an excerpt from it:

"Maybe man is nothing in particular,' Cross said gropingly. 'Maybe that's the terror of it. Man may be just anything at all. And maybe man deep down suspects this, really knows this, kind of dreams that it is true; but at the same time he does not want really to know it? May not human life on this earth be a kind of frozen fear of man at what he could possibly be? And every move he makes might not these moves be just to hide this awful fact? To twist it into something which he feels would make him rest and breathe a little easier? What man is is perhaps too much to be borne by man..."


Just like The Outsider is probably my favorite novel, Swedish maestro Tomas Tranströmer is one of the most satisfying poets out there. Fianlly winning the Nobel Prize in Literature in 2011 after almost two decades in the ballot, the prolific poet deals with the natural world and the people who live in it from a perspective that adds a mystic quality to it. The wonder in his poetry is a constant that make us reconsider our place in this earth. I have included two of my favorite poems of Tranströmer's(translated by Robert Bly):

Under Pressure

The blue sky’s engine-drone is deafening.

We’re living here on a shuddering work-site

where the ocean depths can suddenly open up

shells and telephones hiss.

You can see beauty only from the side, hastily.

The dense grain on the field, many colours in a yellow stream.

The restless shadows in my head are drawn there.

They want to creep into the grain and turn to gold.

Darkness falls. At midnight I go to bed.

The smaller boat puts out from the larger boat.

You are alone on the water.

Society’s dark hull drifts further and further away.

 

 

Outskirts
Men in overalls the same color as earth rise from a ditch.
It's a transitional place, in stalemate, neither country nor city.
Construction cranes on the horizon want to take the big leap,   
but the clocks are against it.
Concrete piping scattered around laps at the light with cold tongues.
Auto-body shops occupy old barns.
Stones throw shadows as sharp as objects on the moon surface.
And these sites keep on getting bigger
like the land bought with Judas' silver: "a potter's field for   
burying strangers."'


I wanted to end this post in a slightly happier mood, so I decided to include one of my favorite songs. Regardless of how I feel, this song(starting at 1:30) always serves as a beacon of sorts--remining me that there is an almost endless supply of new dawns:

Breathe in the night
That crusted tired sunrise
Born again the day
Brings young naivety

A laptop souvenir is worth the weight
In silver a golden son
You'll be home again
And I'll be home again

Mend in my sleep
I'm boxing under water
Waddle on the wake
Waking on the summer day (a summer day)

After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times

And every father's pain
Casts a shadow over a broken son
You'll be whole again
And I'll be whole again

Munificent, artless and ascetic
Playing like a scared
Enthusiastic poodle

After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times ( the troubled times )

All those years
I was hurting to feel
Something more than life

All those years
After all these years
Forget about all the troubled times
And after all these years
Forget about all the troubled times ( the troubled times )

All those years
I was hurting to feel
Something more than life

Perks of Being a Teenager

I saw Perks of Being a Wallflower a few weeks ago and loved it immediately. I was a bit skeptical at first since watching a coming-of-age high school movie at age 22 didn't seem that appealing to me, but seeing Paul Rudd in the cast convinced me. In case you haven't seen it, it's a film adaptation of a Stephen Chbosky novel of the same name focusing on a high school freshmen called Charlie looking to fit into the judgmental label-maker that high school is. He soon meets seniors Patrick and his step-sister Sam who invite him to be part of their exclusive group of outcasts known as The Wallflowers.

Without giving too much away, the movie then becomes a story about how Charlie gradually manages to fit in with The Wallflowers and finds himself through them. I liked this movie for several reasons. I like the fact that Charlie was truly unique in his personality, interests, and fashion style. Whereas many movies fail at trying to create an empathetic individual with a fascinating arc, Perks succeeds. It was refreshing to see Charlie and the rest of the Wallflowers all have their own thing going on.

Although my teenage years weren't revolutionary enough to inspire a book, screenplay, and critically acclaimed movie, watching Perks brought back a lot of memories. Even though some argue that people don't truly find themselves until their 20s come along, I still place more importance in what life was like back then. I feel like being a teenager was sort of like a coming out party--being a kid allows to hide behind the protective bubble that is childhood but the teens give you that first taste of reality. And yes, I'm talking about realizing how much everything sucks.

I remember feeling all the frustration that came from the inevitable adolescent angst. At the time, it felt like there was a collective opinion about every aspect in life that resided within each teenager. It felt like catholicism was the only acceptable religion, skinny jeans and a young girl's t-shirts equal hotness, not caring about school made you super cool, and that horrible, vile, black plague known as emo music that consumed the world for the worse part of a decade was badass.

An image of a wealthy, white male with happily married parents before cutting himself.

In case you couldn't tell, I was turned off by the trends that dominated my high school years. Not all of them, but most. But I'm glad that those things existed and I'm glad that I wasn't a follower because it made me discover things I might have overlooked otherwise. I enjoyed stepping outside of my comfort zone and discovering music on my own and listening to it because I truly enjoyed it and connected to it. From the raw aggression and passion of Slayer to the soothing, "stoner" space daze that The Verve provided, I found new ways of expressing myself even if it was by myself, facing a computer and an iTunes library on my shitty iBook.

Meeting people at 15 was another eye-opening moment that I hadn't previously experienced. Sure, I had some friends and family who loved me, but early 2006 really marks the moment where I started to expand my circles and started meeting people who were genuine and cool. I found others who appreciated Slayer, pretty girls who didn't think every guy was a decaying pile of feces, and even a few cool emo rockers(as hard as that is to admit).

Back then, I learned that even being unique meant having to conform to certain things. For me and my friends, and I say this with no shame, was the phenomenon that Myspace was at the time. It was just so much cooler than Facebook. You had a Top 8 Friends list(where I always had the amazing Marty Friedman at #1), different layouts for your page and background, a display picture, and many other sweet gadgets you could use to customize your page to your personality.

Who didn't love Tom's updates?

Sure, Myspace faded into obscurity with the coming of Facebook, but living in the times and choosing how to live them is what makes the teenage years unique. And that's why Perks of Being a Wallflower resonated with me. Even though it is set in a different era, 'unique' would be the right word to describe it by. Instead of trying to appeal to a very specific audience, Chbosky chose to do his own thing and create a group of characters that represent the rite of passage that being a teenager is supposed to embody.

Part of the reason why Perks succeeds is the fact that it was not only a novel written by Chbosky, but he also wrote the screenplay and directed the movie. That means that he created his own soundtrack, developed characters who have depth and flaws, and edited the movie into a compelling collection of scenes that accurately portrays all the shenanigans, victories, awkwardness, and heartbreaking moments that exist with every teenager without sugar-coating anything.